How to Fit in with AuDHD
Your Cheat Sheet - 5 Unconventional Tips 🔖
Hi there, TrauDHD tribe! 🤩
I know it's been a while. I've been planning to restart my Substack but kept procrastinating (yeah, you know how that goes). But I'm back now and plan to send out at least one newsletter per month.
I’ve been busy lately—mostly with the exhausting task of trying to fit in. Group settings? Not my strong suit. Between the oversharing, interrupting, accidental topic-hijacking… let’s just say I don’t always shine in groups. 😬
Relatable? Instead of constantly fighting these quirks, I’ve decided to lean in and embrace them. Here’s how I’ve started to make peace with my own unique brand of social awkwardness:
Find your crowd 👯♀️: Real belonging isn't about fitting in everywhere - sometimes someone is just not your person. It's about encountering people who appreciate you for exactly who you are. Look for spaces and people who genuinely value authenticity, whether that's in online communities, hobby groups, or a small circle of trusted friends.
Build ‘anchor points’ in conversations ⚓️: Many people with AuDHD find it easier to connect through shared interests (true crime, anyone?) or structured contexts. Whether it’s discussing a favorite topic, engaging in a specific hobby, or just starting with a structured environment, these “anchor points” can make interactions feel less overwhelming.
Enjoy your own company 😌: I must admit, I love my own sense of humor and I crack myself up. Over the past year, I've learned to enjoy my own company, and we're having so much fun.
Set micro goals for social interactions 🎯: Instead of expecting to feel 100% comfortable or “fit in,” set small goals like “find one genuine connection,” or “share one personal story.” It creates a sense of purpose without pressure, helping you focus on quality over quantity and celebrating small wins after each interaction.
Use parallel interaction settings 🪐: Sometimes face-to-face interaction can feel too intense. Parallel activities—like walking side-by-side, working on a project together, or attending a shared event—allow you to bond without direct eye contact or intense one-on-one conversation. This takes the pressure off and often leads to more genuine connections (and let's face it, this sounds kind of cool).
In the next newsletter, I’ll be diving into the art of balancing routine with new sensory experiences—a fine line for many of us!
So glad to be back sharing this journey with you.
Neurodivergently yours 🧠✌️
Magali